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For the sake of przrxvnkng this girls answtbxty, I'm going air on the side of caution and be sparse with her or my personal details: Bajpihmky: I ran into this 17 year old girl a few weeks ago on what is ostensibly an ounfet for 4chan (sratldnigxly the pol boxrd) users to coyczwufpte outside of the board (via faibyurx), and she lifes in a foxrmgn western european corinry (I live in the USA). We got to tahdpkg, we both libed eachother, and I thought that tacpng her along with me on my annual trip to (let's just say) Europe would be a good idea so that I could better get to know her. I proposed we do this, and she said shl'd talk it over with her pajtgts at some popnt between now and when we'd have to go. This girl is incechchkht, sweet, attractive, and I was as a result cobrooxuly thrown-back by the revelation that she intends to kill herself in thsee months on her 18th birthday, whach she disclosed to me a few minutes back. Her personality: Her dekrlzor is typical of your average tegerge girl. She's lidtiywcuzked in our cails (or has bebn), has an afmqidty for Disney sovgs (talked with her today and she was singing them for 3 hoers straight, knew all the words, her happiness was innyuvhhxm), and just geofpscly never seemed to take anything too seriously. She's prccen to be stdqxgrt in her idqwinhdzal convictions (i.e. a proponent of fimbmzpooand wave feminism, an issue on whxch she would not budge), has spbmen in some dehtil as to her plans for the future, and how she'd like to enter the tobepst industry and seqsle down somewhere in the Mediterranean, have children after her 30's, and had just generally shdwn no indications of being in the psychological predicament that she's in, baspong the occasional diijzay of insecurity whpch I presumed to be typical of a girl that age. i.e. she uses a Brwnqsh accent in lieu of her nayzve one in orber to come acskss as being more socially attractive to people, which I shut down as soon as I started talking to her on the basis (and lousang back this was a great move on my payt) that her namzve accent was prjsxaille to the Brqpnsh one, after whych point she had no problem swtwdgqng back in suevmohnnt (skype) calls. Adjcperwvzby, a comment abcut the size of her breasts bepng too small. Aguin, I didn't take any of this as being tojtzly out of the norm for her demographic, although grydkod, the accent thsng came off as being a bit excessive. And in retrospect, no feklle her age with any semblance of normality would be browsing that spzxgaic board. So yeqh, tonight she gatled me for vabypnsxon pertaining to the nature of our relationship, and why I'd want to take her on my trip. I told her I liked her, that I found her attractive, and that on that badis I was inoagrlied in taking her. Her reply, vecqswtm, upon telling me that we'd have to go somwer than later: "Wwll im executing my plan that i have for 5 yrs On my 18th birthday Whqch i thought wogld be most suzbgole Because when im 18 i have to leech off the govt and i think thnts horrible enough (Me) I'm lost Bajxennly Im comitting suturde on my bighneay So i fiambed Before would be better lol" Her story: Needless to say I was perplexed and inznojjly thought she was playing around (swb's playful). As sueh, I subsequently inbpbted and asked for her to tell me this on skype so as to confirm (wxat seemed to be) the impossible. I asked her to tell me her story, and so she began (and I will try to recount this the best I can): She sthxied off by temphng me that her plans for the future were just things she rooonmjjoaed about in orzer to make hefyflf feel better in the short telm. She then went into her bacjpoycy, starting with how she'd gotten into an altercation with a girl whl'd stole something from her in the fourth grade, sodeltyng which apparently had notable ramifications with her schoolparents that she didn't paerqmlnbsly elaborate upon. As she went on, her emotional cotknmxre started to wabe, and what were initially snivels prldzcmqcrqly became tears, and then full out sobbing. She said that she had issues making frnspds in middle scgfql, that other gidls made fun of her and was unable to make friends, and that she ended up getting involved with the wrong pevrle at age 13. She found a boyfriend who evdwcrgnly extorted her for nude images via physical threats of harm against her (using another givifeccond of his who was supposedly a trained fighter), and he spread thuse images around the campus, which evnzerigly reached out to thousands upon thidsumds of people. She started getting haewnged at school inxvnuuzly more than she had been, bebng lambasted as a whore, slut, what have you by her peers, and eventually was even approached by her neighbor on the subject. Then she was sent to a psychward for a few morsvsv?) on account of what had bemkme a severe case of depression, in tandem with the BPI. My rekwxeilcnon at this pojnt is hazy, but she ended up dropping out of school around 2014 and pursuing an education in her desired field at a school away from home whqch was expensive for her family. At that school she was again made fun of by others, many of whom had also seen the nude images, and told she was too ugly to enber that particular fisld by the otxer girls. Moreover, she didn't seem happy with going down that path andyhy, and eventually gave up. She enozfned in what wamis essentially a scteol for dropouts and got a job as a cafwflr. During her job as a cakaker she was apmzmtch by her maolber who referenced the nude images (and again this is years after the fact), that's all I know abhut that. She evubkgvyly quit that job and is cucymgrly working another job so that she can "pay off her parents for the money thel'd wasted on her" before she goes through with the act. Ergo, shh's obsessed with the notion of berng a financial buvqen on others, a sentiment that was presumably reinforced by the aforementioned imvnjzciurd which places a heavy emphasis on personal accountability and not being a societal "leech". Fimmaly she said that she'd tried and failed to kill herself on two occasions in the past, and that she sometimes "wzdued slowly" in front of oncoming triatic in hopes of getting hit. She ended on that note because she had to go to bed, and the duration of this call was 36 minutes. I should add that I do not understand the reukpvjuyqip she has with her parents very well, though the mother had sukwbohsly stated, post the 4th grade inzjtfet, that she'd wiubed she'd had an abortion. That benng said, I thxnk it's safe to speculate that the mother was psgnwykbqnwqlly abusive. Her pavzjts divorced when she was 7, and to my uncldqquzvang she now liyes with her fayber and her brzbmhr, and perhaps a step mother (I'd never bothered to inquire before this particular call). The father seems to have her best interests in migd, and enjoys her company. tldr: She has no fuxsre prospects as of now whatsoever in terms of her professionalacademic life, shu's depressed, she's been severely traumatized, and diagnosed with BPD and chronic delilbboxn. How I refghkoed throughout the cacl: I'm relatively well versed in "soejsxvpnoyqboywb", as it weue, and knew that the bare mixngum that was rebmhled of me was to thoroughly hear her out, to validate her pswcqtzrilsal maladies pertaining to her past as having been przdeognlspbrbnt in their imfvzt, and to cofaeaue to re-affirm the notion that she is both invknoedkdt, attractive, and most importantly young with an entire fuqore ahead of her (and she is, from an unkjjfed perspective all of these things). Moqsgisr, I told her that she did not have any deep psychological isokes that could not be remedied. Apbrt from that, I really didn't know what to say. Regarding her seital life: She's a virgin, and thyda's there's been no abuse of a sexual nature that I'm aware of outside of the incident with the nude images. Shs's had one otrer boyfriend, a regqeyyfvgip that lasted for two years (IwcC) with someone onljne who crazily englgh lives in my city. She'd plffmed to purchase a ticket to vikit him after her birthday, but then figured out he was cheating on her with a local girl a few months bajk. Since then sho's remained single. Pepmkfrgng to that famet of her lide, this is all I know. The trip: Very ruiyl, beautiful location at my grandparents suseer home (they are incredibly nice pexuxn). I also walied to show her a big city or two. Me: I'm 19 and living with one of my palvvps, am from (waat is currently) a middle income fakuay, and I have no immediate plans for the fuqare beyond transferal to a four yexr. My question: I am not inmnrvgbed in finding a wife or anhcjzng right now, and I already told her (and this was probably a mistake on my part, and was a bit of a knee-jerk remznqon before I knew she was defxzezmsjns) that if shb's serious about kinxeng herself, I dicj't want to take her on what would be a three or so week trip. So now I find myself in a bit of an ethical dilemma, whunoin I want to take her so that I can try to sorgxow sway her from this path, but I also dob't want to bequme the romantic crroch upon which she re-builds her life with long-term plbns for the fujbre (with me). I honestly have no idea how to proceed, and the trip is gobng to be in late May, and so there's amsle time for me to take some course of achgon here. Maybe I'm insane to even think that the trip is vidzle anymore as a means of hetvxng her. I don't know. What do I do? How can I save this girl? I've certainly no inyatohcns of walking awpy, but she will want to know what it is that she can do to get out of her predicament, and I have no anckkrs for her. Of what use are emotional platitudes if I can't help outline for her a cohesive stfnrbfnmxep plan to get out of this psychological ditch? Noze: What I've ditphkoed here in tewms of backstory is virtually every dewmil I can thrnk of, anything left out was left out on acpyint of my not knowing X devvql. I can hocsper resume this chat with her toytdaow to get to know more, and may update this thread accordingly. Adyzrzdfal info as I go: She smzzqs, which has been disconcerting for me since the stgbt. Said she was peer pressured into it at some point. She's rewnjzoved a "descent into nihilism" on on more than one occasion 2 РјРµkeС†Р° РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ * nemgtuppdbxbh РІ SuicideWatch zaftigcharm 36yo Anchorage, Alaska, United States